Swallow this pill - oh, and here's your freewill -
go and do not sin again, my son.
It's a beautiful day - they've sent me out to play -
but I'm not allowed to have any fun.
I know full well I'm on the highway to Hell -
the guy on my doorstep says that's fair.
But the one saving grace about that terrible place
is that Robert Johnson's already there.
Every day at noon, some Satanic goon
hauls Robert Johnson to the lunchroom stage.
And while the damned dine on rats, Robert shows those cats
that he's way better than Jimmy Page.
He whips out the riffs, the diabolical gifts
that made him the Devil's pet.
And when he rocks the Hell-house,
No one, not even a Hell-mouse,
is left standing when he's done with his set.
I have no idea what I'm talking about -
I'm making this up as I go.
The guy on my doorstep is preaching again
and I shouldn't interrupt the flow.
But when I ask him if he's heard Robert Johnson's sad tale,
he says, "I'm sorry, I don't know who what is.
But the bright swift sword of a vengeful Lord
must have reduced him to an indistinct fizz."
The guy wanders off, and I wonder where Bob J. went
when his terrible debt got paid.
And I wonder if any in my circle of friends
has ever made a similar trade.
I know full well I'm on the highway to Hell -
the guy on my doorstep said that's fair.
But the one saving grace about that terrible place
is that Robert Johnson's already there.
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